The Weather is Changing

The sky is an awesome and threatening lilac grey. The rain is coming. It will be the first proper autumn rain this year. We have had some beautiful crisp sunny days over the last few weeks, but I am ready for tiny cold raindrops prickling my face as the wind blows the towards me, and the relief of getting home, shaking off, cooking a hearty meal, reading, and knitting.

As the weather changes, so does so much else. Bean & I began packing this weekend, many of our things being sealed up, to be opened in 9 months time by different people. Well, actually the same people, but with an additional set of experiences, and stripped of so many of the things we identify ourselves with - job, home, even my bicycle!

Changing weather, changing leaves, changing seasons.

A Lesson in Impermanence

In meditation class yesterday, in which we discussed:

the world is a mirror reflecting ourselves
total presence in the now equates to total forgiveness
once you have forgiven the whole situation is changed & improved
your emotions are a physical manifestation of your thoughts and therefore your mind (not you)

and as if to reinforce all the beautiful knowledge, after leaving the class I realised my bicycle had been stolen. My beautiful 21st birthday present, the perfect fit, the racing bike of my dreams, gone. So with great effort (I am not going to pretend it was easy), I walked away, and observed my emotions, without becoming involved in them, I accepted the situation and then decided in a course of action, and I tried to keep myself in my body, in the present, and in the stillness. I wasn't wildly successful, I loved that bike, (attachment!), and I am trying very hard to pay off debts and save for a once-in-a-lifetime style trip to South America, I do not particularly want to spend money on a new bike. But, looking back over yesterday evening, 'old me' very well may have been in a mood all night, felt like a victim and got completely engrossed in my life situation, completely forgetting the life within me.

So, I am actually quite pleased, I am making progress, I feel there is more peace in my life, and more presence, and I am quite looking forward to the opportunity to choose a new bike, I would quite like the next one to be green!

As well as the lessons I learned about myself, I am also reminded of the impermanence of things in this world, and the subsequent danger of attachment. It is frightening and humbling to be reminded that nothing in this world lasts forever - at least not in its current form, but also very liberating.

Not only can it be liberating, but it is also counterbalanced with the eternal nature of light, energy, divinity, God, whatever you want to call it, and these are the two things that all life forms have in common- mortality and eternity.